I’ve seen a mother and daughter come in and all hell breaks loose. I’ve seen a group of 12 and all goes well, they are all there to support the bride and it goes off without a hitch. I tell brides this: It doesn’t matter who you bring to your appointment, it is your responsibility to prepare for that appointment.
I give people tough love. Ok, you think that you are mature enough to get married and start a family, but you aren’t mature enough to sit these people down and say, “This is how much I am willing to spend. This is how I want to look. Please don’t talk about my hips because you know they upset me and please remember you are here to shop for my wedding dress.”
When you have these appointments, a lot of it has to do with the bride. She needs to step up and be that woman, let everyone know that these are rules and if you set those rules ahead of time, everything will go smoothly. It’s that simple.
When it comes to hurting someone’s feelings, here is what I think: The mother wants it one way and the daughter wants it another way. You know what? As a parent, your mother just truly wants you to be happy in life. In the end, if you are happy with the dress, she is going to be happy.
It is just reinforcing the bigger picture about why they are there and it isn’t about whether the cleavage is too low or whether it is a princess style or lace. It is about bringing everyone back to why they are there. They are there because they love this person and they want to give her the best advice and sometimes the best advice is through their eye. Everyone has their opinion on what the best advice is. But it’s all about making sure the bride is happy. If the bride is happy then everyone is happy.
Weddings are stressful if you let them. I tell brides this all the time, it is in my book …. You know what? Life is what you make it. It’s like a rollercoaster. You are strapped in and it has left the station so you got a choice. It is your choice, you choose. You can either throw your hands up and enjoy the ride or you can throw your head over the side and puke.
I tell brides you might as well put up your hands and enjoy it. But you have to choose it. Drew Barrymore had a quote where she said, “Happiness is a choice. You have to choose it and then you have to fight for it.” You have to choose to be happy and then you have to fight for it. We create our lives every day by the choices we make.